I am scared of experiencing: London’s darkness

London is filled with many things to do. I thought that every person I’d meet, every event and party I’d go to would fuel my desire to experience, I was wrong.

London to me is very bizarre and dark. I believe that there’s an unconditional amount of creative roads and avenues but my creative ego is never satisfied, I feel that my creative heart is no longer beating.

London is like a pit filled with soulless marionettes , but at the same time there’s a feeling of autonomy in all aspects in my own life. At the same time It’s almost as If my creative ego has surrendered itself to the mundanity of London.

This was written 6 hours after taking Acid.

Sober mind, how do you feel about london?

It’s hard to be consistently positive, but it’s crucial to be grateful for every moment. Being sad doesn’t mean you are ungrateful, I create because I am grateful for every moment. Sometimes I hate the advertised illusion of positivity, because when I’m not positive I feel guilty?

Not every experience is good and not every experience is bad, but exposing your creative eye in every experience will make you see the art in everything, anything and everyone.

I started going downhill when I started to observe every experience with a cracked creative eye. I was so focused on feeling good, that I did anything to feel good.

96 hours sober.

Words and pics: Blue Kizozo